Friday, October 21, 2011

Brings Tears to my Eyes....

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Constantly my blogs are something about relationships and the many complexities that affect them in some way or another (whether bad or good!) and today will be no different, I'm afraid.  So now's your chance to run, if you need to! 

What has prompted me to write this morning is the birth of a baby.  Some friends of ours had their first grandbaby.  Their oldest son and his wife delivered a beautiful baby boy.  Their celebration is huge!  But there is also some sadness in the midst of it all, because the grandparents are here in NC and the new baby and parents live in Hawaii.  It will be another week before they are able to travel out to visit their first grandchild - the firstborn of their oldest son.  

My own son is engaged to a very sweet girl.  We absolutely fell madly in love with her as soon as we met her.  As a woman, I know my desire to always stay within a safe distance to my own Mother... and I only live about 2 1/2 - 3 hours from her (which until I was 30 I never lived more than 30 minutes from her!)  But now that one of my kids is getting ready to get married, my heart aches thinking of how far he will likely always live from me.  Thinking that everyone else will meet my grandchildren first when they are born one day, and see them more than I'll ever be able hurts me more than I could ever express.  Honestly, it brings tears  to my eyes (and an occasional sob) just thinking about it!  I didn't think about this part when I had my children... when they were handed to me as newborns.  It never crossed my mind that one day they would grow up and not be right with me any longer.  

Once again, I think of Josh and Nicole who just had their new son.  And I think of how they are feeling.  And for them I can only feel elated.  I remember that moment of meeting my newborn baby whom I had waited so many months for (in a way it felt like years with the first one, because I had dreamed of having my first child since I was a child myself!)  And I pray that they soak up these feelings.  That they write them down and remember them for the rest of their lives.  On a bad day they can read the words and remember how awesome God is - that He gives us a love for our children that is so special we cannot even find words to describe it adequately.  I always think in some way it's a small inkling of God's love for us.  But for us to fully understand how much God loves us would be more powerful than our human minds and bodies could handle.  

It's a day to celebrate for a new baby, new parents, new grandparents, new aunts and uncles.  A new generation begins with the birth of this baby boy.  And I am here with tears in my eyes with the anticipation that one day it will be me feeling what my friend is feeling as the new grandmother... and hoping I'm strong enough to be who I'm supposed to be at that time.  

I hope you have a GREAT weekend!!